"Halloween" by Glass Candy

Happy Halloween!

Apparently last year I forgot I had a blog for several months and didn't post this song, so I'm posting it this year instead.

The song was written by Johnny Jewel's band Glass Candy as an homage to the classic John Carpenter movie, Halloween. It's perfect for Halloween mixes, and for Halloween party playlists. The video for the song was directed by Alberto Rossini.



To read the lyrics or download the song, go to Johnny Jewel's SoundCloud.

Werewolf Balls redux: Giving the people what they want.

I posted an entry on April 4th, 2011 where I wrote a little bit about an anatomically correct werewolf figure I found at a toy store. The figure was so detailed, with not much left to the imagination. You could clearly see the shapeshifter's shaft and bollocks bulging in its tight and torn blue shorts. Composing that sentence made me feel like I was writing a romance novel. Stephenie Meyer has got nothing on me.

About a year after originally posting the story I started noticing that my blog was getting a lot of page views from people searching on Google for phrases like "werewolf balls", "werewolf testicles", "anatomically correct werewolf", and my personal favorite, "what do werewolf balls look like". I've been seeing these phrases in my blog stats pretty regularly ever since then too. Maybe it has something to do with the popularity of Twilight. It all seems rather strange to me, but who am I to judge? These werewolf testicle enthusiasts probably don't do anyone any harm, right? So what do I care if they're into lycanthrope genitalia?

When I first wrote about this wolfman and his fantastical 'nads, I had no idea there was such a rabid fan base. That and also mostly the fact that my fellow shoppers and I didn't have a camera kept me from posting photographic evidence of this creature's bulge. When I started getting so many hits from people specifically seeking werewolf balls, I had the urge to give the people what they want. I was planning to make another post with photographs, but every time I went back to the store with my camera, they didn't have the werewolf toy. I had done some internet research and found out the company that makes the figures is Papo.

In my research I found some wonderful things. There were no specific mentions of the detailed anatomy of the figure, but there were sentences so funny that it's very possible the people who wrote them are in on the joke. For example, on one site there was a warning about the toy that said, "Choke Hazard - Contains Small Parts". Reading that had me laughing for several minutes straight. On the Toys "Я" Us website, I found a review of the figure that said, "I hope that Toys "Я" Us makes more products like this and makes them in other sizes as well, because I like werewolves in all sizes. Meaning small, medium, and large." I bet you do, buddy. I also found out how god damn expensive these figures are. In that original blog entry I called the werewolf toy cheap, and I guess I just assumed they were because they seemed like the kind of action figures poor kids get. These figures don't even have any articulation! I found several pictures of the figure, balls and all, but I really wanted to post my own photos, so I kept bringing my camera every time I went to the mall, hoping they'd restocked the werewolf figures. After so many visits to the mall without ever seeing another figure I was starting to wonder if the store had gotten complaints about the werewolf and stopped selling it.

Well, finally the other day I was at the mall, with my camera in tow, and on the shelf of loose Papo figures, there was a lone lycanthrope, junk and all. Rather than just taking photos of it and parting ways forever, I actually purchased it, adopting this bally werewolf to take home and raise as my very own. Besides just kind of wanting to own it after all we'd been through together, this way I could take my time during the photo shoot. I feel like I owe good photos to these people who pay visits to my blog over and over again looking for the goods. This is my gift to you, weirdos. I hope you appreciate it.

I hadn't noticed before that the blue shorts were unbuttoned. Maybe they changed the mold since I originally saw it. What a strange toy.

And now for the sexy close-up shot you all came to see...

The werewolf figure is now at home on my Halloween mood table.

Another new addition to the table is Cadbury Screme Eggs, and I'm very happy to add them to my Halloween experience this year.

Minecraft Halloween

I decorated my Minecraft house for Halloween!

I'm really looking forward to some Halloween fun in the new Pretty Scary Update. Witches, bats, pumpkin pies... Should be a great time!

Halloween mini paper lanterns.

I'm a big fan of paper lanterns. I love them. If I was a member of the Green Lantern Corps, my power battery would be a paper lantern. And all the other Green Lanterns would be jealous of me.

I have several paper lanterns, and there's one special one I'll write about sometime in the future. This post isn't for that lantern. This post is for Halloween mini paper lanterns, which I purchased at fiVe BEL°W.

One set with ghosts on them, and one that looks like Jack-O-Lanterns.

I love the ghost ones. I didn't know what to expect them to look like when lit up, but they look cool. The black paper looks great.

The Jack-O-Lantern ones are really special though. Paper lanterns and Jack-O-Lanterns are amazing ideas by themselves. Whoever put them together may have been a little less original and done something seemingly obvious, but they struck gold. Beautiful Halloween gold. These mini ones also throw Christmas lights into the mix, making them like some kind of supergroup. Halloween mini paper lanterns are essentially the Crosby, Stills & Nash of decorative lighting.

Let's take a look at some Halloween costumes.

I'm probably not wearing a costume this year as there aren't any parties planned and I don't have any good costume ideas this year anyway. I have been looking at costumes in stores though, and have taken pictures of a few that I'd like to share.

"Sexy" Halloween costumes seem to have gotten more and more popular over the years. I went to Spirit recently, and while they had many "sexy" costumes for women, these two stuck out to me:

Sexy Edward Scissorhands and Sexy Betelgeuse. I think they should complete the series with a Sexy Jack Skellington.

Hmm, you know, I have the DVD of Beetlejuice and an Edward Scissorhands action figure on my Halloween mood table.

Also at spirit, I found this Incredible Hulk child's costume.

It doesn't indicate it anywhere in writing on the package, but I think it's actually a sleepy child Hulk. Look at that ferocious yawn. You wouldn't like him when he's sleepy. Sleepy child hulk costume includes ripped purple pajama pants and for some reason a mohawk. I guess I see children with mohawks quite often these days though.

The final costume was found at a flea market.

It's an old Ben Cooper costume of the moustached Masters Of The Universe character Man-At-Arms. It's perfect if you love Masters Of The Universe and if you love getting your eyeballs sliced up by sharp plastic. Only one of those is true about me.

Halloween Mood Table 2012

Happy October! It's the 1st of the month, and I set up my Halloween mood table today. I got the idea from X-Entertainment several years back and last year was my first experience setting up my own. The Halloween mood table was also the post today on Dinosaur Dracula, the spiritual successor to X-Entertainment, which is in the middle of its first Halloween Countdown. If you're unfamiliar with the concept of a Halloween mood table, you can read about it there.

My table this year is a big improvement over last year's, and I imagine it will continue to get more awesome every year as I develop and hone my mood table skills. I again used the coffee table that I regularly have in my room, so during the Halloween season I am without a regular coffee table. As I'm sure you can see, it's clearly worth the temporary sacrifice.

I had the collectable LEGO minifigures on the table last year, but this year the Dracula is a Dinosaur Dracula. The Halloween takeout containers housed prizes I won for my GERTY costume 2 years ago, and I thought the containers were cool. Mmm, blog continuity...

There's a stack of season-appropriate DVD's, a skull candle holder, and Batman: Haunted Knight. I know Krang and Edward Scissorhands don't have anything to do with Halloween, but I knew they wanted to be in on the fun, and I think they fit right in. Pumpkin Pie and Spookylicious Pop-Tarts complete the ensemble. Oh, and there's the purple lights and the table cloth, which is actually a fancy scarf of mine.

A pretty special addition to the table this year is a pair of old computer speakers hidden underneath, which can be easily plugged into my iPod to play Halloween music like "Dead Man's Party" by Oingo Boingo,  "Halloween" by Glass Candy, and the All Hallow's EP by AFI.

UPDATE: Check out this entry to see a few more additions to the table.